Sunday, October 23, 2011
I have to do this!
Why am I running a half marathon? Because I can control it. Its about me. I push my body. I set my goals. I achieve them. The last few years of my life were totally dependent on someone else. My husband's weaknesses and strengths set the tone and pace of our life. I never knew what would happen, or when the bottom would fall out. I could do everything to prepare, but in reality I wasn't in control. I was left responding to situations, and cleaning up messes. Running isn't reliant on anyone else. And training for and completing a half marathon depends on one person: me. I can depend on my self! I determine what I want to do, and work hard to make it happen.
Why am I running a half marathon? Because not everyone does it! 13.1 miles of running is not easy. Only .17% of the United States population ran a half marathon last year. It is difficult. It is hard. And you have to be strong to do it! Looking back at the last few years of my life, it was difficult, it was hard. And I when I crossed the finish line I didn't get a medal, or a t-shirt. I had hurt, pain, and disappointment. Like running a half marathon, not many have lived through all the things I have. So running this half marathon is symbolic of what I have gone through, but its the positive counterpart. It will be difficult. It will be hard. It will be my choice, and it's making me stronger!
Why am I running a half marathon? Because as I say, "I buried a husband, I can do this!" Its a challenge. Its a sign of my strength. Its a sign of my survival. Its a sign of my independence. Its a sign that I'm okay; I can't be kept down. I'm a young woman who can put her mind to something and accomplish it!
Why am I running a half marathon? Because life has dumped on me. Life has thrown at me the worst that it has to offer. And now by running 13.1 miles I tell life "take that! You've tried to take me out, but I came back stronger! I'm not moved by what bring my way! I make my own destiny!"